School Prayers!!

 Written at two different times. So times may be a little confusing. : )

School is tomorrow!! And I should really just go to sleep because 5:23 is coming way too soon. But I would just like to point out what a difference a day can make.

Let's just say that I have been at it again. In fact, Monday was kinda bad. I just couldn't get past the idea that I wasn't excited for school to start. I just kept remembering that last year at this time I was beyond excited. After each day of school, I would drive home each night, not being able to wait for tomorrow to come so I could go back to school again. Needless to say, I was not at this point. And that worried me. Why? Am I a bad teacher for thinking this? What is wrong with me? Why am I dreading tomorrow?

I didn't even pray about this on Monday. At all. All day I kept thinking I should really talk to God about this or anything really. But I just kept putting it off. Until that evening. I had actually spent a full day at the school working, and had driven home for a bit. Then I remembered I needed something at the school and decided to drive back to AC to get it. I took one of my favorite little back roads called Green's Farm Road. It is perfect for stars, sunsets and windows-rolled-down-feet-on-the-dash kind of driving. As I was nearing AC, I felt ready to pray. So enters the Hike/Bike trail into the scene. For me, it is actually more like the Ponder/Pray trail. :) It was very much needed. After leaving the trail, I felt better than I had felt all day! I still hadn't figured out what was going on with me but I had made it clear I needed help. I could not do this without Him.

And you know what was playing when I got into my car? Times, by Tenth Avenue North. Seriously. :)

So Tuesday. My turn-around day. The little freshmen came to school for orientation. They gave me quite the little pick-me-up. Then my heart was like.....this is why. And then I can't even really begin to tell you how many times I was reminded of this throughout the day and night. He is amazing.

So even though I know this year might be a little tough for me, it will be okay in the bigger picture of things. I definitely don't have everything figured out. However, I see how beautiful it could be and that gives me hope. Things might be a little/ a lot different.....It does make me really sad and it does worry me. Then I also worry about my seniors leaving. I worry about that fact that I feel like I have been pouring my whole self into these kids, and I don't know if it's enough. Enough for who???

So even though I was a little scared of this year, I felt the first inkling of excitement. Just being around those kids and finally having my classrooms all put together made a world of difference. I was really looking forward to adoration that night. It was getting pretty late when I finally finished up at school, but I actually wanted to go home and shower and eat first. I didn't even get to adoration in AC until like 9:45. In fact, I had almost convinced myself to not go because I thought I should be sleeping. :)

Once again- so glad I went. My amigos where there! Then the 10 o'clock person was late. Which after talking to the family that was there and telling them I would wait to leave until the scheduled person got there, I got a good 15 minutes of one-on-one time with Him! This is only the second time ever I have been at adoration alone, and it was, once again, just what I needed. Then when the 10 o'clock person came, it was Wayne. So I chatted with him for a little while about school. It was a good night and I felt more than ready for school the next morning!

So how did the first day go? Different. As expected. But very, very positive. Thank goodness for hugs all day!

Please pray for my students. Please pray that I can be more for them than just another teacher.