Bryn and Bibles

One time I took Bryn to Sunday mass at St. Jude's in Wichita.

She hated it and never fails to let me know that she never wants to go to church with me again. Bummer. I joke about it with her now, even though I really would love for her to want to go back. Tis life I guess.

Anyway, now that I have officially settled into the "church lady" role in my family, Bryn and I frequently have conversations about God. The cool thing is that often times Kamo is in the same room when these conversations come up. Which then proceed to more grown up conversations about God.

This particular time Bryn was really excited to show me her Bible. I was surprised she had a Bible and in fact I had just bought her one for Christmas. Darn it, I thought. But the Bible she brought was the real deal. It was definitely made for a little kid but still small print and a bit hard for her to read.

So as I was finishing my sloppy joe my sister had so lovely made me, she read to me out of her Bible. And we proceeded with Bible nerd talk. And before you go all crazy and say I gave her too much info, I will call you crazy for two reasons:

1. First off Kami was in the room and she may have looked busy but she was totally listening and piping in here and there.
2. Little kids have amazing minds. They are like sponges. I wish my students wanted to learn as much as Brynley does. Besides the week before she recited Bible verses to me that she has memorized for this thing she goes to at her friend's church.

But it was great. We talked about the Old Testament and the New Testament. We talked about how all the books are important but in the New Testament we learn about Jesus. In fact at that point we talked about the Gospels and then she read out of Luke chapter 2.  She asked such sweet questions like, "What's a shepherd?". She flipped to the front and and asked what "contents" meant. I told her this page showed all the books in the Bible, 73 to be exact. Which on a side note isn't completely accurate because I am sure it was a Protestant Bible. Then she asks, "Well which ones do I have?" That made me kind of laugh because it was cute. "You have all of them!", I told her. She was amazed that 73 books could fit into what looked like one book. 

That day Kami also shared with me that her friend in the new neighborhood they moved into had given her a Bible and a daily devotional type of thing. It was one for moms, so she talked about how much she could relate to it. All in all, I would say we three had a good time Bible-nerding it up.

Here's a pic of Bryn reading the Bible I got her for Christmas to her baby brother.

A Rosary Discussion Goes Awry

Today in Agriscience class one of my students randomly asked about my rosary that I wear. She started off simply enough, "What is that?" 

Then it continued, "Can I see it?" I let her hold it. 

"So how does it work?" I explained it a little. 

Another student, "What saints do you have on it?" hahaha geez kiddos. Well you see...

"What's a saint?" I explained that too.....you can be a saint too! :)

"Why do you pray to Mary?" Explained. 

Is my rosary really that much more interesting than dairy cattle? Yeah, I think so too. 

But then she asked something that took me a little off guard. She was talking about going to church. This particular student is a foster child, so I asked her if she went to church with her foster family or her grandmother, who lives in somewhere semi close to Ark City. She told me that she typically goes with her grandma. Then she asks, "Who do you go to church went?"

"I just go by myself." 

"Why don't you go with your family?"

"I'm the only one in my family, besides my grandma, that is Catholic."

She then looks at me like I am crazy and says, "Well, then why are you Catholic!?".

Why are you Catholic? 

A question that does seem to be popping up more and more lately. At Prayer and Action this summer I remember this is one of the questions we talked about on the first night. However, it was really easy for me to answer. I don't really mean the question wasn't meant for me but it was meant to get young people thinking about taking their faith as their own. Most of them, if not all of them have been Catholics their whole lives. At some point WE all have to choose our faith not our parents or those around us. 

At the Prayer and Action reunion a week or so ago, this question was brought up again in relationship to the Year of Faith. How can I continue to choose to live out my Catholic faith? How can I grow closer to Christ? 

Honestly, it has been something I have been struggling with the past few months. And as my student was asking me that question, I was thinking in my head..... you have no idea what kind of question you just asked me! 

Because in addition to all this talk about choosing my faith I have had the following conversations too: 

Talking to Pastor Stephanie for a good 45 minutes at my sister Megan's wedding about her and her husband mixed marriage. About how she attended mass for awhile because he is Roman Catholic but then how she  chose to become a pastor in the Methodist church. So why are you Catholic, Kasie? 

Having a conversation with one of my sisters about going to church. 

Her- "I really need to start going to church. I need God in my life. I'm going to this new church on    Saturday. Then I am going to try out this other church and then probably go to my friends Lutheran church sometime too."

Me- "You can come to mass with me sometime." 

Her- "No. I don't want to be Catholic."

Note to sister- Neither did I. :)

But I am. And it was the best decision I have ever made. 

It's true there aren't many people in my life that can understand why I like to go to mass in the middle of the week, or get excited over some feast day, or even pray a rosary with. Yes, I want to attend midnight mass on Christmas with my family. Yes, I wish my close friends shared the same beliefs that I do. Yes, I wish they considered going to adoration a good way to pray together. Yes, I want to pray with people. Yes, I even think about stupid things such as how my family would deal with my wedding or my funeral. 

Why am I Catholic? 

How could I not be? The amount of grace and blessings that have entered into my life are too vast to count. There is not a more beautiful thing on this planet. Even if at times I feel alone, I know that God is here and leading my heart closer to Christ. 

St. Elizabeth Ann Seton, pray for us! 

The Best Five Minutes

For the past several weeks the best 5 to 10ish minutes of my week happen right before confirmation class on Wednesday nights. Sometimes the time spent here is even more precious than my time spent in adoration.

After setting up for class, I sneak away for a few minutes to the church before the doors get locked. At Holy Name, there is a small side chapel that is attached to the main church. This is where we have adoration on Monday nights, daily mass when school is not in session and it acts like kind of an overflow area for Sunday mass.

But on Wednesday nights the side chapel is dark. The red candles are lit. Jesus is in the tabernacle. And there is no one else around. Well except the choir people in the choir loft. However, the side chapel is just barely/conveniently hidden from the choir loft in such a way that I can listen to their music but they cannot see me. :) I love it. I pray and listen as they practice the Gloria and Holy, Holy, Holy and random mass songs.

And now that it is cold outside it is even more perfect and cozy. For some reason I imagine all the crazy things going on around me, all the struggles, all the normal daily distractions of life being on the outside of that church building. It's literally my sanctuary. For my weekly "Best Five Minutes" I know that God is good.

For this song I know that God is good.

A Glimpse of Glory

Two weekends before my trek to Indianapolis for National FFA Convention I found myself in Lincoln, Nebraska. Growing up a mere five minutes from Oklahoma, this was only the second time in my life that I had made it to the Cornhusker state.

I was going on a retreat and it was going to be with the School Sister's of Christ the King. I was originally supposed to be going with another friend of mine, however plans had changed and I ended up going by myself. When I arrived I quickly picked up on the fact that this was to be a silent retreat. Somehow, both my friend and I had missed that small detail. Regardless, it was definitely exactly what I needed. It was a quiet two days. In fact, I could not wait for that hour or so of recreation we got on that Saturday night. It was actually pretty joyful- the most joyful I had been in awhile- and it was obviously a fruit of the silence. 

I had never been on a silent retreat. I had never prayed that much in my life either. Mass, Liturgy of the hours, adoration, talks and several mediations each day. In fact, I remember sitting in the chapel, feeling like I had no worries floating in my head; I had prayed them all away. I did reach a point on Sunday morning, where I was done. I was tired and I knew there was one more meditation coming up but I wasn't sure if I was going to do it. Maybe I would just sit in the chapel and do nothing. :)

However, after some much needed coffee, I was feeling my second wind coming on. This time we got to pick what ever meditation we wanted from our book. As I was scanning the titles, nothing was catching my eye. Then I saw, "A Glimpse of Glory." Well that sounds awesome! Who wouldn't want a glimpse of Jesus? 

That morning I traveled with Jesus to the top of mountain and witnessed His transfiguration all while remaining in that church pew. :) However, it made me realize how much Jesus does for us still. He knows our weaknesses, our doubts and our fears. But He never leaves us alone. Just as Jesus strengthened Peter, James and John by taking them up to the mountain with Him that day, he does that for me and for you. He knew all the events to come with his crucifixion and knew they would need help keeping their faith. He provided exactly what they needed. 

Sure, this retreat has helped me when I "came down from the mountain", but it also is much more than that. It's the people, opportunities, and seemingly meaningless events that Jesus puts into our lives that help strengthen us everyday. It's the faith and the hope that he will continue to do this out of love for us. Jesus is so good to us and I can't wait to someday get that glimpse of glory and look upon His face. 

Mary's Heart

Last Monday during my adoration hour I decided to do a reflection/meditation out of this book I have. I was reading scripture in Philippians and then in the 2 chapter of Luke.

The scene in Luke was that of Jesus' birth. Definitely a story that most people, myself included, would say they are very familiar with. However, I got to this line, "And Mary kept all these things, reflecting on them in her heart.", and I just couldn't get past it. How could I have missed this before?! The more I thought of this, the more awestruck I became with Mary. This woman is amazing! 

Keep in mind I had just held my weeks-old nephew in my arms the day before. How could Mary hold the infant Jesus in her arms and know what she knew and not go crazy? Then I began to think- when did Mary know that Jesus would die like he did? 

Later that night I had a discussion with a friend, and we both concluded we thought most likely Mary knew a bit later with prophecy of Simeon. Which on a completely non-related side note, it was cool to get some context about Simeon's prophecy since it's used in Night Prayer. Obviously, I could see that it was from Luke when praying Night Prayer but things usually don't click for me until they do. :) 

However, even if when Mary held Jesus in her arms and didn't really have the slightest clue about the heartbreak she would experience later,  she is still amazingly strong. To have that much faith in God to ponder all things just in your heart, is a little hard for my brain to wrap around. And that line still gets to me.....especially when it is practically repeated later in Luke 2:51. Which is after the prophecy and after she lost and then found Jesus in the temple. Not to mention to just imagine you were Mary and holding that baby in your arms. Jesus was completely dependent on her, just like any other baby that comes into this world. Even more beautiful is that she was completely dependent on Him. Jesus was Mary's whole life; from conception to assumption. 

After all this Mary and baby Jesus meditating I was really excited to hold my baby nephew again. On Friday, we all had the day off from school. I went to mass, visited a bookstore, and headed to see my sister and my favorite little people. Ky was a little fussy at first but within 10 minutes he was out cold. I held my sleeping nephew in my arms for about an hour and a half as he got in his nap. Ky has colic and is usually pretty fussy so Kami was really excited this was occurring and asked me if she could shave her legs and clean the bathrooms. haha Meanwhile, with Ky in my arms, I thought about how at one point Jesus was so small and helpless just like him. I tried to imagine how Mary must have felt......I know this is a bit futile but I still tried. :) And as Ky continued napping on my chest, I prayed a rosary for him. It was perfect. The little guy is just so adorable. 

Oh and one last thing, while at the bookstore that day, I came across a holy card with the 7 Sorrows of Mary. Once again, I had heard of this before, but like I said it doesn't click until it does. After what Mary went through, I know that she can and will help us with our sorrows here on earth. What a strong momma we have!

Looking Good

This past week I have been in FFA Land.

FFA Land is both a place and a time that happens a few of times of year. National FFA Convention is the biggest "FFA Land" of the year but similar activities, thoughts, and feelings also occur during State Convention and State CDEs.

Anyway, I am not really going to post about FFA Land other than to say it was on my mind when I arrived home to "Arkalalah Land". Arkalalah is a big deal for the people in the community of Ark City.  Basically, it starts Wednesday night and last until late Saturday evening. There are several parades, craft shows, carnivals, fried foods, helicopter rides, egg tosses, turtle races, Queen Alalah activities, and plenty of other fun things to do. I have never really been into Arkalalah, mainly because it usually falls on the same weekend of FFA Convention. But this year we came back a night early and got to hit up the tail end of Arkalalah, the "big parade".

I was sitting on the tailgate of my brothers old truck and I get a text from a student of mine:

"hey bogart"

I was tempted to ignore it. But it was a student that I had just taken to convention and I thought it might be important.

"What do you need?"

"Yea ummmmmmm can I have the od jacket I have right now"

This is one of my freshmen FFA members who had borrowed one of the chapter's FFA jackets to wear at FFA Convention. I just told him the chapter needed that jacket but we'd order him one. I thought that was the end of that.

Later, I was walking downtown during the parade to meet up with someone, and I thought I saw an FFA jacket through the masses of people. Really these streets are packed full of people. At first, I thought  it was because I had just arrived from the sea of blue FFA jackets only hours ago. However, I did a double-take and it was, in fact, one of my students in his FFA jacket. In fact the same student who had just texted me asking about keeping the FFA jacket.

I hollered his name and said, "What are you doing?"

He was in the middle of Arkalalah, in full out Official Dress (OD). He had on the right pants, shoes, and tie. Perfect FFA OD.

"Just wearing my OD!"

We couldn't really even stop to talk because of the traffic, so I just said, "Looking good!"

What was he doing?

This student never ceased in asking me one of these questions any chance he got while we were in Indy:

"Can I take my jacket off? It's hot."
"Do we get to go change yet?"
"When can we change?"
"When we go in this restaurant, can I take my jacket off?"
"That tie better be a clip-on tie!"
"I'm not wearing black shoes- I just brought my white tennis shoes."
"Can I just wear this FFA jacket with my jeans."

Needless to say, I set him straight real quick with all the ends and outs of proper FFA official dress.

Oh geez, he drove me crazy most of the week with his questions. However, there he was in perfect OD in the middle of Arkalalah a mere 12 hours after we had arrived in Ark City. He was so proud of that jacket. He was proud in a way I hadn't seen even some of the most dedicated FFA members be in long time. It made me smile....real big. He brought FFA Land back to Arkalalah Land. And he was looking good.

A Truckful of Nuns

In case you were wondering, this is what a truckful of nuns look like:

                 

Oh, wait! I meant a truckful of mums.....................

I guess it is better than a truckful of bums. Or tums. Really? Enough with the puns! Okay, I will stop now.

However, I did get a good laugh out of my welding boys last week when our mums were delivered. They seriously thought I said "nuns" instead of "mums" AND they still followed me outside to get them.

After seeing the truck and no nuns to be seen, they started laughing and said, "Oh mums! I was thinking is that even legal?!"

Ummm....probably not. But hey we all thought it was funny and my welding boys learned what mums were. Plus, we talked about nuns. Hahaha very funny God.

But God wasn't finished yet. One of my welding boys had this green shirt on that said something about "Faith Accompanied by Works" and it really sparked James, the mum truck driver's, attention.

"That's an interesting shirt there."

I kind of brush him off a little. Sort of like, "Why are you talking to me about this, right now, in front of everyone and the mums."

But he was persistant and continued to to talk to me about God, the Bible, and hearing God speak to us, and the aforementioned green shirt.

Before you knew it my class was inside, and I am having this prolonged conversation with James. I was pretty hesitant to talk to this complete stranger about my faith at first but before you know it things are coming out of my mouth and I am thinking, "Why the heck did I just tell  him that?!" Geez, Kasie. Go teach your class. lol

For example:

He mentioned that God has spoken to him.....like audibly. I make a remark about that not happening with too many people.... which actually may or may not be true; I don't know. He just caught me way of guard. Then he immediately says, "He did to Abraham!"

The conversation is rolling at this point. We are talking about God speaking to us, or me feeling the lack thereof, and the fact that I was baptized a little over a year and half ago. In fact, he hardly let me get a word in edgewise until I told him that. We ended the conversation both agreeing that God is great. It was a doozy of a conversation.

God definitely has a sense of humor. Thank you God for sending me the crazy mum/nun truck driver. Thanks for the reminder of sharing my faith with those around me.

For James, mums, nuns, and green shirts- I know that God is great!